Series on Seminarians

STIRLING  Studying mechanical engineering at New Jersey Institute of Technology (NJIT) in Newark was the perfect fit for Stephen Delia Jr. of St. Vincent de Paul Parish here — or so he thought. After all, he has an aptitude for math and for all things mechanical — forever trying to figure out how machines and devices work.

But a strong devotion to the Eucharist since childhood instead led Delia to follow a calling he felt for many years to the priesthood.

His decision to become a priest was so strong it overcame a previous decision after high school to earn a secular degree first before entering seminary to gain some maturity and “broaden my point of view,” according to a suggestion from his mother, Eileen. However, by the end of his sophomore year at NJIT, he felt disillusioned by his prospective career path as a mechanical engineer.

“Those two years were difficult. I realized that I was having more enjoyment serving the parish and at the altar during the summer than I was having during the school year. I did not graduate NJIT. It was time to say ‘yes’ to the same ‘yes’ that I already had made in my heart to God for the priesthood,” said Delia. Now 24, he applied and was accepted as a seminarian of the Diocese in 2018. He then transferred to St. Andrew’s Hall minor seminary at Seton Hall in South Orange to finish his philosophy studies. This fall, he will enter his third year of theology studies at the Pontifical North American College in Rome. “Today I felt like I’m on the path to where God wants me to be,” he said.

Using his mechanically-inclined mind, Delia has been building his own dream of the priesthood in the Diocese, which now includes enjoying the methodical lessons about theology that he has been studying at the Pontifical University of St. Thomas in Rome, also known as Angelicum University. It is run by the Dominican religious order, said Delia, who has been serving a summer assignment at St. Francis de Sales Parish in the McAfee section of Vernon.

“I like learning St. Thomas’ systematic way of seeing theology — having interconnecting parts with a logic behind it — which gives me an opportunity to use my science and technology background,” said Delia who served at a camp for poor youths in Limerick, Ireland for a summer pastoral experience after his first year at the North American College. The camp is run by the Franciscan Friars of the Renewal. “Most of the boys had emotional problems and trouble at home, like being abused. They fought with each other but were also joyful and generous. I saw boys share their lunch with other kids who didn’t have anything,” he said.

Those types of powerful experiences have been deepening his call to the priesthood — rooted in the faithful family life he experienced growing up. Born in Long Hill, he attended Sunday Mass at St. Vincent’s with his mother, a retired U.S. Customs inspector; father, Stephen Sr., a programs analyst; and two older sisters, Gabrielle, now 30 and married, and Natalie, now 27. His parents gave their three children “good formation” by leading the praying of the rosary on Sundays. From second grade through high school, Delia was homeschooled with Kolbe Academy, a Catholic program that encourages self-learning, he said.

“Homeschooling taught me to learn everything I can. It gave me a love for learning,” said Delia, the only one of the three siblings to continue the program through high school. He socialized with other homeschooled children at weekly “co-op” meetings and with other boys in the community through Boy Scouts where he earned the rank of Eagle Scout.

When he was seven years old, Delia began attending daily Mass in the mornings at St. Vincent’s with his mother. He also would serve at the altar during these liturgies, he said.

“I thought about the priesthood at daily Mass. God spoke to me through the Eucharist. I grew to have a devotion to the Eucharist. My desire just welled up in me. I said, ‘I’m going to be a priest,’ ” Delia said.

That desire intensified at NJIT where he joined the Newman Center and attended Masses, Adoration, retreats and Bible studies the Extra Mile, a ministry in which members pack small dinners, travel to Penn Station in New York City and hand them out to the homeless. In his second year, he joined a mission trip to Guatemala where he helped prepare for the construction of a large school for poor children.

After two years at NJIT, he “mustered up the courage” to speak to his mother who told The Beacon, “By then, he was 20. He really wanted it. If God wants it to happen and he works hard, it will happen.”

Delia talked to Father Richard Carton, St. Vincent’s pastor, who urged him to apply to the diocesan Vocations Office. He was accepted into the seminary program and at St. Andrew’s, which he said has a “feeling of community” among the seminarians.

This fall, Delia returned to the Diocese from Rome before the lockdown in the State due to the coronavirus pandemic. He finished his studies online while living at St. Vincent’s and then started a summer assignment at St. Francis. He counts both Father Richard Carton and Father Christopher Barkhausen, St. Francis’ pastor, as influencers in his goal of becoming a priest.

“Father Rich gives of himself to his people and doesn’t count the cost,” said Delia who shadowed Father Barkhausen to house calls, assisted at funerals and burial services, interviewed Confirmation candidates and led a formation series about virtue on Zoom video conferencing. “Father Chris showed me that being a priest involves weird hours — not 9 to 5. There is a rhythm and balance to the priesthood,” he said.

Anticipating that he will be called to ordination as a priest of the Diocese in 2022, Delia said he looks forward to “becoming a vessel of God’s grace by celebrating Mass and the Sacraments. I also want to pour out my life for people to give them what they need.”

His mother, Eileen, listed some of the qualities that she thinks will make her son a good priest.

“He is humble, friendly and witty. He is always trying to learn more to become stronger in what he is doing. He also wants to help everyone, especially in seeking the kingdom of God,” she said.

Having known him since he was about 14, Father Carton spoke of Delia’s devotion to the Eucharist, deep prayer life and well roundedness.

“Stephen will find something in common with all people to appeal to them,” Father Carton said. “He also has a mechanical mind. He will tell you how a car works and relate that to theology — how God is the intelligent designer of it all,” he said.