Through the lens of faith

STIRLING  Modern life and society bombard Catholic husbands and fathers with so many challenges and distractions — from work and family pressures to moral temptations and societal attacks on faith and the meaning of authentic manhood. Those pressures make it difficult for a Catholic man to take up the challenge of striving to become a “saint” in this day — strengthening his relationship with Christ, taking leadership of the home and, by extension, transforming society.

Yet a group of 30 men at St. Vincent de Paul Parish here, including Matt Zolnick, 32, have been taking up that challenge as part of “That Man Is You!,” a 26-week interactive program to help them tackle the issues that they face through the lens of faith. Starting in September, these men have been gathering in the St. John Paul II room in the church basement at 7 a.m. on Saturdays for 80-minute sessions that begin with fellowship over breakfast. They feature in-depth DVD presentations on specific topics that combine Church teaching, Scripture and the wisdom of the saints with historical and scientific research.

After the video, the men divide into small groups to discuss their roles as husbands and fathers that God entrusts to them and obstacles to their becoming modern “saints” — all in efforts ultimately to formulate a plan to overcome these obstacles with the guidance of seven principle steps. Last fall, St. Vincent’s hosted the first 13 weeks of the first year of the series — guided by the theme “Becoming a Man after God’s Own Heart.” The parish invites men to a “New Year and a new you,” when it continues the other 13 weeks of sessions, starting on Jan. 25 at 7 a.m. Paradisus Dei, Texas-based a ministry that strives to strengthen marriage and family life, developed the program in 2004.

“The content of the videos is substantive and the discussions are beneficial and practical. They challenge me to look at my own life. I gain wisdom and knowledge from others — either younger or older men — who have been through different experiences,” said Zolnick, a member of a core team that helped bring the program to St. Vincent’s. He is married to Elena Bird Zolnick, St. Vincent’s director of scared music; together, they have a two-year-old daughter and a child on the way. One video, he said, cited the faithful example of St. Mother Teresa of Calcutta, who encouraged her the Missionary Sisters of Charity to pray in Adoration in the morning for moral and spiritual clarity. “This series has been eye-opening,” Zolnick said.

“That Man is You!” journeys with men and their families on the path to holiness. It is guided particularly by teachings of the Second Vatican Council and St. Pope John Paul II and is framed by seven principle steps for participants to follow: honor your wedding vows, use money for other people, give God some of your time, set your mind on the things above, find God in yourself, find God in other people and make it easy to be good and hard to be bad. The entire program spans five years of formation and is structured along with the Church’s liturgical calendar. Father Richard Carton, St. Vincent’s pastor, had come across the program and suggested that parish adopt it. With Zolnick, the core team includes Greg Allen, Don DeFabio, Shawn Gallic and Tom Welsh.

On Nov. 23, before Advent began, the men of “That Man is You!” received inspiration from St. Joseph, husband of the Blessed Virgin Mary and father of Jesus. He remains a model of faith, with his acceptance of God’s plan that Mary would bear a child conceived by the Holy Spirit. He married Mary to shield her from the laws that called for the stoning of unwed women who were pregnant. St. Joseph also guarded the Holy Family on its dangerous journey that eventually led to Bethlehem, Steve Bollman, founder of Paradisus Dei and the “That Man is You!” ministry, says in the video for that session.

“Joseph follows God’s commandments. He is totally dedicated to the Jesus for the future of the Holy Family and the whole world,” Bollman said. Joseph, he said, exhibits authentic male leadership by exercising personal responsibility, clarity of thought and integrity of action and providing a foundation for the future. “We also can transform the world — but not in the same way as Joseph,” he said.

Later in history, Christianity transformed the Roman Empire, which was mired in sin: pagan worship, sexual immorality, marital infidelity, artificial contraception, infanticide and abortion. Rome’s adoption of Christian­ity helped reverse those trends and paved the way for higher fertility rates and greater social, political and economic stability, said Bollman, using historical and scientific research.

After watching the video, the men split into small groups to reflect on two questions that Bollman proposed: “In what ways do you offer yourself in sacrifice for the purity of your spouse?” and “How do you manifest the Father, who is rich in mercy, to your children?” After the session, the men were invited to attend 8:30 a.m. Mass in St. Vincent Church.

Before leaving, Justin Floyd of St. Vin­cent’s, a married father of four, told The Beacon about the program’s “great talks” among the men “about what works and what doesn’t” in living the faith.

“I’ve had success in incorporating these lessons — based on Christian formation — into my own life,” Floyd said.

Before the video, Father Carton publicly encouraged the men to find inspiration in the witness of Christian martyrs, such as Blessed Miguel Agustin Pro, a Jesuit priest whose feast day is Nov. 23. Before he was executed in Mexico in 1927, he forgave his persecutors and then declared, “Long live Christ the King!” Father Carton said.

“To be a martyr — to be a man — is to stand up and give your life to something. That is the essence of our relationship with Christ. The martyrs and the saints knew that and we should know that too,” Father Carton said. Later, he praised “That Man Is You!,” telling The Beacon that it “gives Catholic men the opportunity to come together to be men, to talk about their struggles about being Catholic and to encourage each other.”