WAYNE Engaged couples preparing for the Sacrament of Marriage learned about God’s Plan for a Joy-Filled Marriage as they took part in the Diocese’s marriage preparation program rooted in St. Pope John Paul II’s Theology of the Body at Our Lady of the Valley Parish here May 21.
Coordinated by the Diocese of Paterson’s Office of Family Life at St. Paul’s Inside the Walls in Madison, couples preparing to be married are required to take two courses before receiving the Sacrament of Marriage at their home parish. The two Pre-Cana courses are God’s Plan for a Joy-Filled for a Joy-Filled Marriage, a series of talks based on the Theology of the Body, and Life Skills, which offers practical insights and assistance in building a successful marriage. God’s Plan is done on a diocesan level and couples can register on St. Paul’s website. Life Skills courses usually take place at a couples’ home parish or a neighboring one. Couples can also take both courses during a weekend.
Cindy Costello, who serves in the Office of Family Life as coordinator of marriage ministry, led the course on God’s Plan for a Joy-Filled Marriage. Married for 30 years and the mother of five children, Costello spoke on Theology of the Body, offered insights through a Powerpoint presentation and videos, and shared her own experiences in married life to the young couples.
“I’m excited to share my life experience in marriage and just being Catholic,” she told the engaged couples. “It’s a gift I’m happy to share in allowing young couples to understand God’s plan for each of us, especially as you prepare for the Sacrament of Marriage.”
Costello gave five talks during the six-hour program — “God’s Plan in the Beginning;” “Christ Restores;” “What is the Sacrament of Marriage?;” “Before the Wedding Vows,” and “After the Wedding Vows.” The day allowed the young couples to understand more deeply the beauty of marriage as originally designed, and the gifts husbands and wives are meant to be for one another.
She explained the origins of Theology of the Body, which was written by St. John Paul II, and said, “He wrote it before he became Pope when he would spend time with young couples and wanted to explore human love through God’s plan.”
For each of the talks, Costello shared the following on God’s Plan for a Joy-Filled Marriage:
• God’s Plan in the Beginning. Couples are called to be the four qualities of God’s love — free, total, faithful and fruitful. This was God’s plan before Adam and Eve sinned. It is challenging, but it is something beautiful that’s worth aspiring to live.
• Christ Restores God’s Plan. Jesus first public miracle took place during the wedding at Cana. It is purposeful Jesus manifests himself as God at a wedding. Spouses are encouraged to serve one another daily in small ways. God asks us to entrust our lives and our marriages entirely to Christ.
• What is the Sacrament of Marriage? God is the author of marriage. The Church didn’t come up with rules to control marriages but the guidelines to set married couples free and live authentically. The Sacrament of Marriage results from a promise made by a man and a woman to each other before God and the Church, which creates a bond of everlasting love.
• Before the Wedding Vows. Sexuality is a gift from God. Today’s culture is saturated with information about sex. Real love helps couples to see the uniqueness of the other person created in God’s image. If not based on that, it is based on lust. God asks couples to wait for sexual intimacy until the vows of marriage have been exchanged. Sex is meant to be a renewal of the wedding vows.
• After the Wedding Vows. God wants each spouse to be an active participant in their marriage. God should be part of a marriage daily. Sexual honesty needs to be part of marriage, which means loving freely, totally, faithfully and fruitfully.
In addition to God’s Plan for a Joy Filled Marriage, couples are required to take a Life Skills course, which takes place at the parish level, and will cover topics such as communications, conflict resolution, family of origin, finances and more. Couples also are invited to take a Natural Family Planning class. This class teaches couples a natural and effective way of postponing or achieving pregnancy. The course is taught at St. Paul’s Inside the Walls and the next class will take place on June 18.
“Marriage is the model of all the sacraments. It celebrates union, life and love,” Costello told the couples. “You will be called to make many sacrifices and there are going to be times where you feel out of love. My advice is to invite Mary and Jesus into your marriage. They will be there to restore God’s love and grace.”
[Information on marriage preparation: contact a priest or deacon and visit www.insidethewalls.org/guide-to-marriage-prepartion.]